October 22, 2009
07:22 am
Windows 7, as in 1987
Another gem from Microsoft's increasingly delusional Steve Ballmer on the auspicious debut of Windows 7:
"The Internet" is a network, Mr. Ballmer, not a "product." It works equally well for a PC, iPhone, toaster, or networked lawn mower.
Let's translate what he really means:
"We have dithered around so long without real innovation that our current model of using the internet requires you to sit down at home or work in front of a crappy Windows PC rather than use it wherever and whenever you want, when you need it."
In other words, he's defending a status quo that's more than a decade old, one that arrived with 24K modems and AOL floppy discs.
Another gem from Microsoft's increasingly delusional Steve Ballmer on the auspicious debut of Windows 7:
"Let’s face it, the Internet was designed for the PC. The Internet is not designed for the iPhone,” Ballmer said. “That’s why they’ve got 75,000 applications — they’re all trying to make the Internet look decent on the iPhone."
"The Internet" is a network, Mr. Ballmer, not a "product." It works equally well for a PC, iPhone, toaster, or networked lawn mower.
Let's translate what he really means:
"We have dithered around so long without real innovation that our current model of using the internet requires you to sit down at home or work in front of a crappy Windows PC rather than use it wherever and whenever you want, when you need it."
In other words, he's defending a status quo that's more than a decade old, one that arrived with 24K modems and AOL floppy discs.
October 20, 2009
06:20 pm
It’s customer service, silly
One:
Went to Target tonight, for no apparently good reason other than I needed to get out of the freakin' house and I live in a consumer society. Picked up a couple of sweaters, some nuts, fabric softener, and tonic for a nice G&T.
Then I got to the checkout. All around the store there were "associates" stocking shelves, but only 5 checkouts open, each with long, long lines. I spied a line that was finishing up checking out, slid into place thinking I'd made a coup, and loaded my items onto the belt. The man in front of me was paying with multiple gift cards and credit cards. As if that wasn't difficult enough, the cashier made the pitch about saving 10% by applying for the Target card. They got into a discussion about it -- English was not this man's first language. It went on and on. And on. He decided against it. She pressed him. He relented. She started to do a credit check and realized she didn't know how to do it. It was at that point, 5 minutes after I put my stuff on an empty belt, that I gathered it up, put it back in the cart, and started looking around.
Every other checkout was jammed, 5 people deep on average.
I left my cart there and walked out. The checkout clerk undoubtedly got credit toward her quota of card applications, and all those associates who could have been checking customers out undoubtedly got the shelves nicely stocked. But they lost my business.
Two:
The Quiznos near me is in a small, new building at an intersection near the airport and a major freeway. I used to stop by a few times each month. Then, a new tenant moved in next to them. I have no idea what it is - it has a Chinese name and seems like it's a place where people drop off their kids, because ever since then the small parking lot was jammed up with people sitting in their cars, waiting. Every parking spot was taken, all the time, and it was impossible to get in and out of the lot or find a place to park.
And that's why I stopped spending money at that Quizno's. The neighbors.
Tonight, I noticed that the Quizno's has gone out of business.
Here endeth the lessons.
One:
Went to Target tonight, for no apparently good reason other than I needed to get out of the freakin' house and I live in a consumer society. Picked up a couple of sweaters, some nuts, fabric softener, and tonic for a nice G&T.
Then I got to the checkout. All around the store there were "associates" stocking shelves, but only 5 checkouts open, each with long, long lines. I spied a line that was finishing up checking out, slid into place thinking I'd made a coup, and loaded my items onto the belt. The man in front of me was paying with multiple gift cards and credit cards. As if that wasn't difficult enough, the cashier made the pitch about saving 10% by applying for the Target card. They got into a discussion about it -- English was not this man's first language. It went on and on. And on. He decided against it. She pressed him. He relented. She started to do a credit check and realized she didn't know how to do it. It was at that point, 5 minutes after I put my stuff on an empty belt, that I gathered it up, put it back in the cart, and started looking around.
Every other checkout was jammed, 5 people deep on average.
I left my cart there and walked out. The checkout clerk undoubtedly got credit toward her quota of card applications, and all those associates who could have been checking customers out undoubtedly got the shelves nicely stocked. But they lost my business.
Two:
The Quiznos near me is in a small, new building at an intersection near the airport and a major freeway. I used to stop by a few times each month. Then, a new tenant moved in next to them. I have no idea what it is - it has a Chinese name and seems like it's a place where people drop off their kids, because ever since then the small parking lot was jammed up with people sitting in their cars, waiting. Every parking spot was taken, all the time, and it was impossible to get in and out of the lot or find a place to park.
And that's why I stopped spending money at that Quizno's. The neighbors.
Tonight, I noticed that the Quizno's has gone out of business.
Here endeth the lessons.
October 15, 2009
02:29 pm
And you thought it was the 21st century
Wow. Just wow.
Good lord. Read the racist "I'm not a racist" quotes from this justice of the peace. Classic bigot jargon - "I have lots of black friends..." "I let them use my bathroom..." wow.
My favorite part? "I try to treat everyone equally." A classic conservative spin, where one claims that something bad is something good. Well done.
Wow. Just wow.
Good lord. Read the racist "I'm not a racist" quotes from this justice of the peace. Classic bigot jargon - "I have lots of black friends..." "I let them use my bathroom..." wow.
Interracial couple denied marriage license in La.
By MARY FOSTER, Associated Press Writer
Thursday, October 15, 2009
A Louisiana justice of the peace said he refused to issue a marriage license to an interracial couple out of concern for any children the couple might have. Keith Bardwell, justice of the peace in Tangipahoa Parish, says it is his experience that most interracial marriages do not last long.
"I'm not a racist. I just don't believe in mixing the races that way," Bardwell told the Associated Press on Thursday. "I have piles and piles of black friends. They come to my home, I marry them, they use my bathroom. I treat them just like everyone else."
Bardwell said he asks everyone who calls about marriage if they are a mixed race couple. If they are, he does not marry them, he said.
Bardwell said he has discussed the topic with blacks and whites, along with witnessing some interracial marriages. He came to the conclusion that most of black society does not readily accept offspring of such relationships, and neither does white society, he said.
"There is a problem with both groups accepting a child from such a marriage," Bardwell said. "I think those children suffer and I won't help put them through it."
If he did an interracial marriage for one couple, he must do the same for all, he said.
"I try to treat everyone equally," he said.
Read more: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2009/10/15/national/a124653D11.DTL
My favorite part? "I try to treat everyone equally." A classic conservative spin, where one claims that something bad is something good. Well done.
October 11, 2009
04:07 pm
Goulish Delights
I'm nothing if not ironic - a graphic artist who knows next to nothing about art. But hey, I know what I like... and I like the pop art stylings of Shag and the nostalgia of Disneyland. So on my visit this weekend, I dipped into my savings just a bit and snagged two great pieces of Shag art commemorating the 40th anniversary of The Haunted Mansion!
First, "Goulish Delights", of which I was lucky enough to get number 6 of a limited run of 200...
And then, because there's always room for one more, there's "A Dismaying Observation:"
As I pocketed my Amex and carried out the huge boxes, I could hear the staff of the Disney Gallery calling after me, plaintively... "Hurry back! Hurry back! Be sure to bring your credit card! Make final arrangements now..."
I'm nothing if not ironic - a graphic artist who knows next to nothing about art. But hey, I know what I like... and I like the pop art stylings of Shag and the nostalgia of Disneyland. So on my visit this weekend, I dipped into my savings just a bit and snagged two great pieces of Shag art commemorating the 40th anniversary of The Haunted Mansion!
First, "Goulish Delights", of which I was lucky enough to get number 6 of a limited run of 200...
And then, because there's always room for one more, there's "A Dismaying Observation:"
As I pocketed my Amex and carried out the huge boxes, I could hear the staff of the Disney Gallery calling after me, plaintively... "Hurry back! Hurry back! Be sure to bring your credit card! Make final arrangements now..."
October 06, 2009
08:27 am
The Newest Worst Ever
Here it is, the answer to a question I don't recall asking: the new Doctor Who logo for 2010...
By way of comparison, here's the previous logo we loved to hate:
I don't wanna be one of those fans, so I'll duck out of this cavalcade of criticism right now and leave you to it.
[Update: the BBC reports that this composition is NOT the way it'll be presented in real life - the logo is on the left, and an "insignia" on the right will be used separately. Whew. Suddenly, it's much better.]
Here it is, the answer to a question I don't recall asking: the new Doctor Who logo for 2010...
By way of comparison, here's the previous logo we loved to hate:
I don't wanna be one of those fans, so I'll duck out of this cavalcade of criticism right now and leave you to it.
[Update: the BBC reports that this composition is NOT the way it'll be presented in real life - the logo is on the left, and an "insignia" on the right will be used separately. Whew. Suddenly, it's much better.]
September 17, 2009
07:33 am
The big-government bureaucrats fail us again
What utter bullshit.
Someone was "forced" to pay for a cab because Metro was so crowded? And a congressman has to get involved?
Please. It's more likely that Metro was crowded because of the immensely successful DC Shorts Film Festival.
After all, what self-respecting right-wing tea bagger would ride that massively popular and useful, tax-funded, Johnson-era Great Society subway, the ultimate product of a liberal mindset?
Metro Was Ill-Prepared for March, Texas Congressman Says
Thursday, September 17, 2009
A Texas congressman sent a letter Wednesday to Metro General Manager John B. Catoe Jr. demanding an explanation for why the transit agency didn't do more to prepare for the massive influx of conservative activists at Saturday's march on the Mall.
Rep. Kevin Brady (R) said an 80-year-old woman and her 60-year-old daughter were forced to walk and pay for a cab because the subway system was so crowded. He said he heard many complaints from people who traveled long distances to attend the event, which served to challenge some of President Obama's signature policies.
"Based upon numerous eyewitness reports by participants in the march, it is clear Metro did not adequately prepare for the influx of Americans traveling to D.C. for this historic event," Brady said in his letter.
Metro spokeswoman Lisa Farbstein said the circumstances surrounding the large crowds will be researched and a response will be sent to Brady. She said she couldn't elaborate because she had not read the letter.
-- James Hohmann
What utter bullshit.
Someone was "forced" to pay for a cab because Metro was so crowded? And a congressman has to get involved?
Please. It's more likely that Metro was crowded because of the immensely successful DC Shorts Film Festival.
After all, what self-respecting right-wing tea bagger would ride that massively popular and useful, tax-funded, Johnson-era Great Society subway, the ultimate product of a liberal mindset?
September 16, 2009
06:28 pm
Commuting on the precipice
- The car in front of me was swerving erratically. The reason was obvious: the driver was chatting on the phone, holding it to his ear while he drove. Which, of course, is illegal.
He continued to swerve, and the next thing I knew he was gone — disappeared from the driver seat. By this time I'd changed lanes and slowed down to avoid the worst.
Up he popped, he'd bent down for some reason while driving at 70mph on Highway 85. I let him get way ahead of me. - The white monster pickup behind me was unhappy with my speed. 70 wasn't enough, and then I slowed and moved right. He gunned past me, then moved all the way to the left. It was then that I saw it: in the back of the pickup, a large dog, standing. Not in the bed. Standing on the toolchest behind the cab. Standing on the toolchest and stepping way to the left so he could look out around the driver's side of the cab. On a pickup truck driving, now, about 85mph. The dog's feet skittered about and my heart pounded. He gingerly turned around and walked to the passenger side. The last I saw before the truck barreled out of sight was the dog bending his neck around the right side of the cab...
as the truck sped down the left lane. The car pool lane. With only a single passenger.
Perhaps he counted the dog. For the moment.
02:52 pm
Welcome to 1952
This is fact, not hyperbole. And I don't even need to comment.
Rush Limbaugh, in September 2009:
This is fact, not hyperbole. And I don't even need to comment.
Rush Limbaugh, in September 2009:
Kid shouldn't have been on the bus anyway. We need segregated buses -- it was invading space and stuff. This is Obama's America.
If homosexuality being inborn is what makes it acceptable, why does racism being inborn not make racism acceptable? I'm sorry -- I mean, this is the way my mind works. But apparently now we don't choose racism, we just are racists. We are born that way. We don't choose it. So shouldn't it be acceptable, excuse -- this is according to the way the left thinks about things.
September 15, 2009
09:39 am
Here’s to the crazy ones
Tuesday, September 15, 2009: Microsoft today announced that it has begun shipping "Office 2008 for Mac Business Edition," replacing the previous "Standard Edition" and "Special Media Edition" with a single package offering the complete Office suite with support for Microsoft Exchange included.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009.
3 months from the end of 2009.
Office 2008.
Kudos, once again, to Microsoft's crack product marketing and naming teams.
Also, let's compare:
Apple: "Pages"
Microsoft: "Office 2008 for Mac Business Edition"
Apple: "Mac OS X Snow Leopard"
Microsoft: "Windows 7 Starter" "Windows 7 Home Premium" "Windows 7 Professional" "Windows 7 Ultimate Edition"
Apple: "Genius"
Microsoft: "Retail Technical Advisor"
Apple: "Concierge"
Microsoft: "Retail Customer Service Associate"
It's like Microsoft's namers feel they're winning the game by sheer number of syllables.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009: Microsoft today announced that it has begun shipping "Office 2008 for Mac Business Edition," replacing the previous "Standard Edition" and "Special Media Edition" with a single package offering the complete Office suite with support for Microsoft Exchange included.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009.
3 months from the end of 2009.
Office 2008.
Kudos, once again, to Microsoft's crack product marketing and naming teams.
Also, let's compare:
Apple: "Pages"
Microsoft: "Office 2008 for Mac Business Edition"
Apple: "Mac OS X Snow Leopard"
Microsoft: "Windows 7 Starter" "Windows 7 Home Premium" "Windows 7 Professional" "Windows 7 Ultimate Edition"
Apple: "Genius"
Microsoft: "Retail Technical Advisor"
Apple: "Concierge"
Microsoft: "Retail Customer Service Associate"
It's like Microsoft's namers feel they're winning the game by sheer number of syllables.
September 13, 2009
08:32 am
Can’t quite figure out who they’re protesting against
AP Photo/Jose Luis Magana
This is a photo from yesterday's "march on Washington" by what are laughing called "conservatives" these days.
So, here's my question. See the guy on the right with the Benjamin Franklin quote?
Where the hell was his protest during the Bush administration?
Meanwhile, I'm laughing out loud at the assertion by Rep. Marsha Blackburn (R, of course, TN) who said that the attendance at the protest was so high — 1.5 million — that the highways around DC had been closed. Having lived my entire life in DC, let me tell you - it would have to be something like 10 million people to close, say, the Beltway, and even that seems farfetched. The reality (something that today's conservatives have little interest in or knowledge of) is that there were probably closer to 60,000 people... less than the capacity of tiny little Disneyland in California. A world of fantasy, indeed.
Alex Koppleman's report from the scene:
Every one of these protestors is actually a few years late — the things they're saying would have been much more understandable if directed at the Bush administration.
AP Photo/Jose Luis Magana
This is a photo from yesterday's "march on Washington" by what are laughing called "conservatives" these days.
So, here's my question. See the guy on the right with the Benjamin Franklin quote?
Where the hell was his protest during the Bush administration?
Meanwhile, I'm laughing out loud at the assertion by Rep. Marsha Blackburn (R, of course, TN) who said that the attendance at the protest was so high — 1.5 million — that the highways around DC had been closed. Having lived my entire life in DC, let me tell you - it would have to be something like 10 million people to close, say, the Beltway, and even that seems farfetched. The reality (something that today's conservatives have little interest in or knowledge of) is that there were probably closer to 60,000 people... less than the capacity of tiny little Disneyland in California. A world of fantasy, indeed.
Alex Koppleman's report from the scene:
...a young woman who declined to give her name pulled me aside.
"I just wanted to let you know there are some normal people here to protest government spending," she said. Identifying herself as part of a local chapter of the College Republicans, she added, "We're not all nuts. I just wanted to let you know that."
She was right, too. Not everyone at the protest was "nuts," not by a long shot.
There was Linda Raileanu, for instance, who carried a sign reading "Nurses against Obamacare." A registered nurse who told Salon she had more than 20 years of experience working, in part, in Philadelphia hospitals, Raileanu said she was there because she worked with physicians and nurses who were against the Democratic proposals for healthcare reform and were "very upset Obama's giving the perception we're for it." She wanted to represent them, she said. But she did participate in that alternate reality a bit. Though she'd worked to provide end-of-life counseling, she told Salon she was against the provisions in the bills going through Congress that would provide coverage for people who choose to receive such counseling because she believed it should be done by professionals, not bureaucrats. (No bureaucrats would be involved in the actual consultation.)
But there were certainly a lot of people there who seemed like they'd fall under the "nuts" category, at least by the College Republican's standards. There was one with a sign that asked, "Whose spirit is in the White House?" and included photos of Adolf Hitler, Karl Marx, Fidel Castro, Hugo Chavez and Obama. Another sign borrowed the Joker Obama poster that's gotten a few minutes of fame recently, adding a Hitler mustache to the president's face; underneath the image were the words "Obamacare is Eugenics." One man held a sign reading, "Transparent? I see through your socialist lies, fool." Each o in "fool" had been formed by the Obama logo.
And there was the other woman who pulled me aside. She had come down from Germantown, Pa., she told me, but she, too, declined to give her name -- for fear of Obama's "snitches," she explained.
"I studied Nazi Germany, I read the story of how they took over," she told me. "From the very beginning I heard it with Obama ... I've studied the camps. That's why people are here, because they're afraid of the death camps that are coming." The woman also said she believed liberals had "voted for a hijacker ... voted for al-Qaida," but said she understood, because they hadn't known, and she was ready to forgive them if they woke up to the situation.
The atmosphere and the slogans were, in places, extreme enough that four liberals who'd come to parody the protesters were having no trouble slipping in unnoticed, even cheered. This despite the four -- Jack Neville, Julian Brunner, Tushara Ekanayake and Marina France -- carrying signs like one that read "A whole lot of white people here today" and another that asked "Where's the proof?" and showed an image of Obama's certification of live birth. Ekanayake's sign warned of gay Muslims -- it should have been a tip-off, except that he was also carrying a photo of Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal, a rising star in the Republican Party, and telling people he was Jindal's nephew. That, he said, had allayed suspicion.
"It's such an example of group think," France said of the crowd at the rally. She made a good case, too, pointing out yet another way in which the reality on the Mall Saturday differed from the one beyond it. One of the more popular themes in protesters' signs was a theme Beck has been harping on lately, the alleged proliferation of so-called "czars" like the drug czar in the Obama administration. Many of those signs linked the presence of those czars to Communism -- it was unclear if any of the protesters holding them were aware of the real history of Russia, in which the Communists overthrew and replaced the czars.
Every one of these protestors is actually a few years late — the things they're saying would have been much more understandable if directed at the Bush administration.
September 09, 2009
02:35 pm
Post hoc, ergo propter hoc, persevero
They're experts, the right wing are, at twisting anything. You remember, of course, that these are the people who claimed that all the evil and unconstitutional things the Bush administration did were worth it, because we had no more terrorist attacks. They're very good at these fallacies.
And they're not stopping.
Sarah Palin now claims in her various screeds (including a Wall Street Journal op-ed) that the "death panels" she warned about are now not gonna happen - because she was so courageous in speaking out about them. Never mind that she made them up.
Jim Greer, the insane Republican from Florida who implored us to just "think of the children" when Obama dared to plan to speak to high school students? Well, Greer now claims that because Obama didn't perform an indoctrination or brainwash the kids, it must have been because he was stopped by Greer's heroic efforts at pointing out the truth.
It's the ultimate triumph of the Karl Rove method - the man known as Turdblossom has taught the right to scoop up that pile of shit and grow beautiful flowers in it.
They're experts, the right wing are, at twisting anything. You remember, of course, that these are the people who claimed that all the evil and unconstitutional things the Bush administration did were worth it, because we had no more terrorist attacks. They're very good at these fallacies.
And they're not stopping.
Sarah Palin now claims in her various screeds (including a Wall Street Journal op-ed) that the "death panels" she warned about are now not gonna happen - because she was so courageous in speaking out about them. Never mind that she made them up.
Jim Greer, the insane Republican from Florida who implored us to just "think of the children" when Obama dared to plan to speak to high school students? Well, Greer now claims that because Obama didn't perform an indoctrination or brainwash the kids, it must have been because he was stopped by Greer's heroic efforts at pointing out the truth.
It's the ultimate triumph of the Karl Rove method - the man known as Turdblossom has taught the right to scoop up that pile of shit and grow beautiful flowers in it.
12:00 pm
She said, he said
Sarah Palin sez: "Democrats' proposals would still empower unelected bureaucrats to make decisions affecting life or death health-care matters."
Gene Cowan sez: "Republicans continue to empower unelected, money-grubbing HMO executives and accountants to make decisions affecting life or death health-care matters."
Sarah Palin sez: "Democrats' proposals would still empower unelected bureaucrats to make decisions affecting life or death health-care matters."
Gene Cowan sez: "Republicans continue to empower unelected, money-grubbing HMO executives and accountants to make decisions affecting life or death health-care matters."
September 03, 2009
01:46 pm
The Big Black Man Is Coming For Your Children
It is very telling that I haven't been posting here - the craziness coming from the right wing is so far above the norm now, it's a bizarre concentrated craziness that comes from the complete disintegration of a party which used the crazy as its base. There's no longer leadership to the Republican party, nothing to tamp down and placate the insane, so crazy is now bubbling up to the top and oozing out of every crevice.
And of course, the dark shadowy evil behind the party is egging it all on, the media is lapping it up and promoting it, and it's all so insane that I can't wrap my mind around it or calm down long enough to write a blog entry.
So, today's crazy tour de force: the nuts are up in arms because the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES is giving a speech at a high school (Wakefield, my father's alma mater and my neighborhood high school before I moved to California).
These two quotes from web comments about cover it:
It is very telling that I haven't been posting here - the craziness coming from the right wing is so far above the norm now, it's a bizarre concentrated craziness that comes from the complete disintegration of a party which used the crazy as its base. There's no longer leadership to the Republican party, nothing to tamp down and placate the insane, so crazy is now bubbling up to the top and oozing out of every crevice.
And of course, the dark shadowy evil behind the party is egging it all on, the media is lapping it up and promoting it, and it's all so insane that I can't wrap my mind around it or calm down long enough to write a blog entry.
So, today's crazy tour de force: the nuts are up in arms because the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES is giving a speech at a high school (Wakefield, my father's alma mater and my neighborhood high school before I moved to California).
These two quotes from web comments about cover it:
Who does this president think he is? As much as the demorats would like to have it, we are not a socialistic society and do not need govt TV to brain wash our kids. This is the start communism hiding behind socialism.
I bet obama will use his speech for political purposes, afterall he is a politician. Obama is slowly but surely destroying this country as we know it. There's not telling what it will look like 4 years from now.
August 27, 2009
08:22 am
The End Is Nigh
In just a few months, we won't be able to create nicely symmetrical novelty glasses for New Year anymore.
In just a few months, we won't be able to create nicely symmetrical novelty glasses for New Year anymore.
August 12, 2009
06:31 pm
In which Gene reflects on his old age
Holy crap — in two days I'll be 43? Really?
That's some major league, new jack crap there.
I just learned that I am part of Generation X. Believe it or not, I never knew that — I thought that was the generation that followed me. So, yeah, that makes me feel just a teensy bit younger.
So, some of the people who were born in the same year as me, the distant 1966:
Michael Imperioli, Patrick Dempsey, Cindy Crawford, Tone Loc, Edie Brickell, Robin Wright Penn, Luke Perry, Stephen Baldwin, Janet Jackson, Julianna Margulies, J.J. Abrams, Mary Stuart Masterson, John Cusack, Matthew Fox, Halle Berry, Adam Sandler, David Schwimmer, Helena Bonham Carter, Salma Hayek, Sinead O'Connor, Kiefer Sutherland.
As I get older, I start to have that empathy with my elders. Not, as I had suspected when I was younger, because I feel old and creaky... but because I don't feel old and creaky and now realize what stress stereotypes can inflict on people my age. Seriously, I am now more than twice my father's age when I was born. And I don't feel old enough to have a child of my own.
Still, math is a scary thing. I'm likely more than halfway done with my life. (And the spectre of having been, possibly, close to death already is still there.) I tend to find myself measuring out time and whether or not I've accomplished the correct things by now, as if there's a concrete road map for life. I tend to look at my career — pretty much stalled — and think I've lost the battle. But then there are people at my office who are 20 years my senior or more, and I realize that we all fall into those sticky webs and sometimes we can't climb out.
Am I ever gonna be a millionaire? Not unless I win the lottery, and I don't even play that. Will I ever get married? That's not at the top of my list, which is good 'cos it's likely not ever gonna happen. Will I ever get off this damned planet? Probably not.
But you know what? I'm going to Disneyland tomorrow night, and I'm gonna feel like a 13 year old. I don't know how a huge multinational conglomerate grasping for every last cent in my pocket manages to do it, but dang if they don't.
I may not get carded anymore these days, but at least I can drink whatever I want.
Holy crap — in two days I'll be 43? Really?
That's some major league, new jack crap there.
I just learned that I am part of Generation X. Believe it or not, I never knew that — I thought that was the generation that followed me. So, yeah, that makes me feel just a teensy bit younger.
So, some of the people who were born in the same year as me, the distant 1966:
Michael Imperioli, Patrick Dempsey, Cindy Crawford, Tone Loc, Edie Brickell, Robin Wright Penn, Luke Perry, Stephen Baldwin, Janet Jackson, Julianna Margulies, J.J. Abrams, Mary Stuart Masterson, John Cusack, Matthew Fox, Halle Berry, Adam Sandler, David Schwimmer, Helena Bonham Carter, Salma Hayek, Sinead O'Connor, Kiefer Sutherland.
As I get older, I start to have that empathy with my elders. Not, as I had suspected when I was younger, because I feel old and creaky... but because I don't feel old and creaky and now realize what stress stereotypes can inflict on people my age. Seriously, I am now more than twice my father's age when I was born. And I don't feel old enough to have a child of my own.
Still, math is a scary thing. I'm likely more than halfway done with my life. (And the spectre of having been, possibly, close to death already is still there.) I tend to find myself measuring out time and whether or not I've accomplished the correct things by now, as if there's a concrete road map for life. I tend to look at my career — pretty much stalled — and think I've lost the battle. But then there are people at my office who are 20 years my senior or more, and I realize that we all fall into those sticky webs and sometimes we can't climb out.
Am I ever gonna be a millionaire? Not unless I win the lottery, and I don't even play that. Will I ever get married? That's not at the top of my list, which is good 'cos it's likely not ever gonna happen. Will I ever get off this damned planet? Probably not.
But you know what? I'm going to Disneyland tomorrow night, and I'm gonna feel like a 13 year old. I don't know how a huge multinational conglomerate grasping for every last cent in my pocket manages to do it, but dang if they don't.
I may not get carded anymore these days, but at least I can drink whatever I want.
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